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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25575520">Secrets and Understanding</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Big_Hazard/pseuds/Slight_Hazard'>Slight_Hazard (Big_Hazard)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Shipper (2020)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Fluff, Kim's a bad person, M/M, but like, not that bad</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 03:07:44</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,716</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25575520</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Big_Hazard/pseuds/Slight_Hazard</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>While Way is getting beat up, Pan kisses Kim and he wakes up from his coma. Kim Immediately sets to fixing everything she broke.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kimhan "Kim" Dhamrong-rattanaroj/Way</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>38</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Secrets and Understanding</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Thai shows need more fanfic, no matter how stupid and nonsensical it may be.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Kim wakes up in a panic as something presses against his mouth. His eyes open only to be attacked by something hairy. He squirms, shoving at the beast until he's nearly falling off whatever he's lying on. The thing backs away, and a huge heaving sigh leaves Kim's lungs as the face of that stupid girl enters his vision.</p><p>"I'm sorry!" she shrieks.</p><p>Kim rolls off the bed, standing on wobbly legs to get far enough away from her to think. The room looks like a hospital, but why would he be in a hospital? The girl tries to walk around the bed toward him, and he takes another shaky step back.</p><p>“You need to help Way,” she says almost in a panic. “He’s being attacked.”</p><p>The air in the room picks up and Kim braces himself for the world to change. A figure comes out of the shadows, the glitter on her neck and shoulders the only thing that registers. His head hurts.</p><p>“Where is he?” Kim asks, ignoring the suspicious figure.</p><p>Pan pauses and Kim desperately wants to shake her. “I don’t know,” she says. “Phingphing is outside.”</p><p>Kim starts running. He dodges under the reaper’s scythe, busting out into the hallway. He’s nearly falling over himself to get around the corner, but he spots Phingphing on a bench and starts for her.</p><p>Phingphing stands, stuttering out bullshit until Kim holds up a hand. “Where is he?” he asks, stopping her rant.</p><p>“Behind the hospital,” she says. Kim’s already running by the time she adds, “Off has a knife!”</p><p>Kim speeds through the building, dodging and weaving through patients and doctors alike. He dashes through the half-open door, rounding the corner in record time and losing the orderlies he gained in the process.</p><p>The scene falls into place before him, Way and Khett lying on the ground in pain, the bastards standing above them. Kim keeps running. He knows it’s a stupid move, but he tries to dropkick the bastard anyway.</p><p>Off stumbles back, and Kim scrambles up from the ground, readying himself for the next attack. “If you have a problem with me,” Kim says, “you should really take it out on <em> me </em>.”</p><p>The bastards stare at him in surprise. Kim waits. A moment later, Khett and Way are standing at the ready behind him. A moment after that, and everything kicks off.</p><p>Off waves his knife around, looking like a child. He misses every swipe, so Kim blocks and goes for his throat, grabbing and squeezing. He grabs the knife arm with his other hand, holding it out to the side with his elbow locked. He squeezes, cutting off circulation in both areas.</p><p>“Well,” Kim asks, “are you sure you want to do this?”</p><p>Off sucks in air as best he can, eyes going wide when Kim just presses down more. The fight rages on around them, all but forgotten with the weight of Off’s life in his hands. Off’s eyes cut to the right, and Kim spins them seconds before one of Off’s friends takes a swing at them. A fist collides with Off’s unprotected side. He curls in on himself, knocking them both off balance.</p><p>They fall to the ground, rolling away from the fight. Kim forces his way on top, straddling Off and resuming his hold. He slams Off’s arm on the ground until he lets go of the knife. Someone reaches for it and Kim leans over, trying to bite them.</p><p>“EVERYONE STOP!”</p><p>Kim freezes with his teeth centimetres from the offending arm. They all turn to the voice, each one of them confused by the high pitch of it.</p><p>Pan stands there with her hands balled into fists, looking about ready to join the fight herself. Her mouth opens, but only a shriek passes through.</p><p>Kim turns back to Off. He grips Off’s jaw, picking his head up and slamming it into the dirt. “Give up,” he growls. “You can’t win this.” He leans closer, voice going lower so just they can hear. “If you don’t, <em> I will kill you </em>.”</p><p>Kim nods up at the rest of them then, and Way locks his arm around the neck of one of the attackers. Khett follows by body-slamming the other to the ground. Off glares, trying his best to intimidate Kim off of him. Kim just presses harder against his pressure points.</p><p>“Alright!” Off huffs, slapping at Kim’s shoulder with his free hand. “I give up, okay? I’ll leave you alone.”</p><p>Kim grins and pats Off on the cheek. “Wasn’t so hard, now was it?” He stands and steps away, fully expecting Off to charge after him again.</p><p>That’s when a hoard of nurses and other hospital staff swarm the scene. They all get separated and dragged off to different corners of the hospital to get checked up.</p><p>---</p><p>“You have no recollection of what happened this past month?” the doctor asks, looking deep into Kim’s eyes like he could be lying.</p><p>“One minute I’m on my bike,” Kim says extra slow since the doctor obviously has a hearing problem, “the next minute I’m here. Far as I know I haven’t been up before now.”</p><p>“Must be amnesia caused by the fall you took,” he says, writing something down in his file. “We’ll have to take another look in a few days.”</p><p>“Does that mean I’m free to go?”</p><p>“Yeah, of course.”</p><p>Kim bows and heads out, jumping back when he bumps into a giant ball of hair. Pan stares up at him wide-eyed. Khett rounds the corner behind her, looking equally surprised. Kim smiles at her like he would with anyone else, but somehow it makes Khett scowl worse than he was.</p><p>“Sorry about that,” Kim says.</p><p>“No, no, no, I’m sorry,” Pan splutters. Her face changes into a scowl of her own. She hits him in the chest with her tiny fist. “You lied to me! The exams-”</p><p>Kim grabs her hand, shocking her enough to pause. “I’m sure everything is just a misunderstanding.”</p><p>“I found the thumb drives,” she says, full of determination.</p><p>Kim keeps the polite smile up, however fake it may look at this point. “Let’s talk about this somewhere else, alright?” He starts toward the exit, tugging her along with him. He’s still in hospital clothes, but that barely matters when she’s trying to ruin all of his hard work.</p><p>“But your clothes-”</p><p>“It’s fine,” Kim says, pulling at her arm until she follows him. She gives a secretive look to Khett, and he starts after them too. “Sorry bro, we need to have a private conversation.”</p><p>Pan resists again. “He knows,” she says, almost embarrassed by the fact. “I showed him.”</p><p>Kim tries to stay calm, knowing everything would definitely be worse if he blew up at her in the hospital. “Alright,” Kim says, feeling anything but, “I guess you can come along too.”</p><p>Pan yanks on his arm, pointing to the patient area. “I still have a room.”</p><p>“Right,” Kim mutters, “let’s go then.”</p><p>Pan leads them there, offering little in the way of conversation, not that Kim really wants to speak to her. They file in and Kim checks the bathroom for stray ears, shutting all the doors behind him as he steps into the main part of the room.</p><p>“So,” Kim says, taking a mildly defensive stance in a spot where he could see if the door opens, “what is this about?”</p><p>Pan sits on the bed and picks at the blankets. “I was living in your body,” she says, and Kim almost has a heart attack at those few words, “and I discovered some of your <em> exploits </em>.” She looks up at him with the most self-righteous glare. “You’ve been dating a teacher to steal exams, haven’t you?!”</p><p>Kim feigns surprise as best he can with the swirling panic in his jumbled brain. “Now, that does sound like a terrible thing to do. Are you sure it was me?”</p><p>Pan’s glare deepens. “I broke up with…” She glances at Khett in the corner, a pout joining the look. “<em> Kana-na </em> for you.”</p><p>Kim mentally curses the stupid girl. He too looks at Khett, acknowledging the glare he’s sending him. Kim leans against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest. He drops the nice guy act altogether. “What did you do with them?”</p><p>“With what?” Pan asks, seeming to be as big of an idiot as he thought.</p><p>“The thumb drives. What did you do with them?”</p><p>“I haven’t done anything with them.”</p><p>“Good. Don’t.” Kim lifts up from the wall, and leans over the end of the bed, getting in Pan’s face. “Don’t do anything with them. Don’t tell anyone about them. Don’t tell <em> anyone </em> about <em> anything </em> you know about my life. I would hate for something <em> bad </em>to happen to you.” He grins at Khett, saying, “You’ll keep her in check, right Khett? Wouldn’t want anything to happen to your little girlfriend.”</p><p>Khett steps forward, but freezes at Kim’s responding glare. He looks at Pan in concern, but doesn’t say anything.</p><p>Pan’s eyes are wide, glimmering with a hint of fear no one can fake. “I won’t tell anyone. I promise.”</p><p>Kim smiles, going right back to that overly polite attitude. “Wonderful. I’m glad we’ve had this chat.”</p><p>---</p><p>The air in the house is muggy and suffocating, and it’s only partially because of the weather. Kim walks into the kitchen behind Khett, squinting at him when he yanks a sticky note off of the fridge. Khett opens the fridge, staring into it like he might find the answers to the universe there, and eventually pulls out a carton of banana milk.</p><p>“Since when did you drink banana milk?” Kim asks, shoving Khett out of the way to peer into the fridge himself.</p><p>“Does it matter?” Khett mutters, walking out of the kitchen without a second glance.</p><p>Kim just shrugs to himself, pushing the banana milk to the back. He grabs a sausage from the bottom drawer, and a packet of crackers from the cupboard, finding a serious lack of almost everything in the kitchen. He makes a mental note to go shopping soon, and heads upstairs to his room.</p><p>It takes a moment to remember that there was a girl living <em> in his body </em>, but when he does the mess in his room makes perfect sense.</p><p>The thumb drives are sitting in the middle of the floor for everyone to see, just waiting to be found by someone who would snitch. Kim snatches them up, heading to the balcony only to find the pot missing from the ledge. He looks in the room for it, but there’s nothing even proving it existed in the first place.</p><p>Kim is standing on the rug, trying to decide where the next best place to hide them would be, when his phone buzzes. He digs it out of his pocket, smiling to himself at the name.</p><p>“Do you want to play?” it says, an emoji of a soccer ball on the end of it.</p><p>Kim throws the drives in a drawer, hiding them behind some other shit just in case. He sends back an enthusiastic, “Hell yeah,” and heads back out of the house.</p><p>---</p><p>Way stops the soccer ball with his foot, picking it up as he walks over to Kim. He stares deep into Kim’s eyes, offering the utmost sincerity as he says, “I’m in love with you.” He turns the ball toward Kim, showing a carefully written, ‘Will you be my boyfriend?’</p><p>It has been mere <em> hours </em>since Kim woke up missing a whole month of time. Days that seem to have had a major impact on Way's train of thought. Kim just stares, his own brain shutting down from the shock of it all.</p><p>“Kim?” Way tests Kim’s forehead for fever, looking at him in concern. “Are you okay?”</p><p>Kim can’t help but laugh, causing Way to back up a step. He smirks, licks his lips, and asks, “Did I ever tell you about the girl I’m dating?”</p><p>“Kana-na? You’ve mentioned her once or twice.”</p><p>“Do you know <em> why </em> I’m dating her?”</p><p>“...no?”</p><p>Kim glances around, looking for prying ears. He leans in close, whispering, “She’s a teacher. I’ve been stealing exam answers since I was a kid.”</p><p>Way’s jaw drops, his expression hard to read past ‘surprised’. “You’ve been stealing exams?” he asks, sounding offended. Kim worries he’s properly fucked up for three whole seconds. “And you haven’t been <em> sharing </em>? Dude! I’ve been failing everything this whole time!”</p><p>Kim cracks up, grinning like an idiot. “Sorry! I had to keep it under the radar.”</p><p>“But you’ll share now right?" Way asks, crowding into Kim's space again. "We can say you’ve been tutoring me.”</p><p>“Yeah, totally.” Kim bumps the soccer ball against Way’s stomach. “Anything for my boyfriend.”</p><p>Way grins, dropping the ball and grabbing the sides of Kim’s head, smacking a fucked up kiss to his lips. Kim rolls his eyes at the eagerness, but reciprocates nonetheless. He eventually has to yank his head away to stop Way from eating his face. The stupid grin Way gives him is wholly worth all of it though.</p><p>“Are you going to stop beating people up for calling you gay now?” Kim asks, fully knowing that it’ll still be a sore spot. “Finally got over your internalized homophobia?”</p><p>Way grimaces, pouting like a small child. “That’s a lot of big words I don’t want to listen to.”</p><p>Kim scoffs, laughing and shoving Way backwards so he can walk away. “I’m hungry. Let’s go eat.”</p><p>“No vermicelli though,” Way says with a laugh.</p><p>“What? Why? I like vermicelli.”</p><p>Way throws an arm over Kim’s shoulders, trying to hide a stupid grin. “Nevermind, you can have as much as you want.”</p><p>“Good,” Kim huffs, “don’t want you restricting my eating habits like Phingphing did.”</p><p>“Oh god no. The woman <em>doesn’t</em> <em>eat</em>! At all! I don’t understand it!” Way glances at Kim, the look in his eyes something deeper and more intense than Kim has ever seen before. He looks away immediately, staring in the opposite direction as he mumbles, “I’d still love you if you were fat.”</p><p>Kim elbows him in the side, laughing at the stupidity. “Did you just picture me fat?”</p><p>“...no.”</p><p>Kim laughs harder, whole body shaking with mirth. “Do you like me fat? Do my love-handles turn you on?”</p><p>Way’s chest puffs out, holding his chin up high in mock confidence. “So what if they do? Huh? Your everything turns me on.”</p><p>“Disgusting.”</p><p>“You’re disgusting.”</p><p>“You’re the one who loves disgusting people then.”</p><p>Way’s mouth opens, slowly closing and turning into a frown. “Dammit.”</p><p>---</p><p>Pan fucked things up worse than Kim initially thought. Because of her, all of the kids in his class think he’s an idiot with brain damage. Now he has to repair his reputation as well as the relationship with Kana-na.</p><p>Kim sits at his desk by an overly smiley Way - at least she didn’t fuck up the seating arrangement - and peers at Way’s open notebook, snickering to himself at the messy scrawl. “You get any better at taking notes or should I ask someone else?”</p><p>“My notes are perfectly fine,” Way mutters, pushing his notebook onto Kim’s desk.</p><p>“Yeah,” Kim says, squinting at the scribbles, “if you can read them.”</p><p>Way tries to take it back and Kim slams his hand down on the book. Kim gives a placating smile to him and the rest of the class, sweetly saying, “Thank you for your help, dear friend. I’ll be sure to repay you in the future.”</p><p>“Uh-huh, you better.”</p><p>Kim picks up the book to look more closely at it, still unable to read even a single letter. He points to a spot that looks vaguely like it says ‘Hammer phone cock’ and asks, “What does this even say?”</p><p>Way glances at the page, and his eyes shoot wide open. He knocks Kim’s hand out the way and rips the page out of the book entirely. “That says nothing,” Way says, not even a little bit convincingly. “It’s not important.”</p><p>Kim shifts his squint to Way, trying to reform the letters in his head. The only formation that makes sense...still doesn’t make sense. “Learn how to cook?” he asks, watching Way’s cheeks turn red before the sentence is even finished. “Why would you need to learn to cook?”</p><p>Way stares at the corner of the ceiling. “A man needs to know how to cook.”</p><p>“And why’s that?”</p><p>“Because…” Way waves his hand around like it explains everything. “Y’know...reasons.”</p><p>“Uh huh,” Kim mutters. “It’s obviously not for Phingphing, so…” He looks pointedly at Way. “Is it for me?”</p><p>Way glares at the girls peering at them from the front row. “I’m not the smartest, aight? So what if I’m trying to become house-husband material instead?”</p><p>“Aww, look at you preparing for the future.”</p><p>“Shut the fuck up.”</p><p>“No, but for real, that’s <em> adorable </em>.”</p><p>Way shoves into Kim's shoulder, nearly pushing him off his chair. He immediately rights himself when the teacher comes in, looking like nothing happened. The teacher turns her back and Kim sticks his tongue out at Way, snickering to himself at the returned contempt.</p><p>---</p><p>“<em> Kana-na </em>,” Kim cooes into the phone, “please? I’m sorry, I didn’t mean what I said."</p><p>"But," Kana-na whines, "you said we shouldn't be together anymore. That it was wrong. We could both get in trouble!"</p><p>"I know I did," Kim says, sitting beside Way on his bed. He gives an over-dramatic sigh. "But I miss you." He's moving the phone away from his ear before the squeal even makes it through.</p><p>"<em> Ohhhm, </em>you know I can't stay mad at you~!"</p><p>"Perfect, I'll meet you at the usual time, alright?"</p><p>"I can't wait!"</p><p>Way looks at him in disgust, but Kim is so close. "Bye bye now."</p><p>"Goodbye, my love!"</p><p>Kim hangs up, holding up a finger to Way's opening mouth. He restarts his phone, waiting for the screen to go black before saying, "God, I fucking hate her cutesy bullshit."</p><p>Way pouts, looking jealous and embarrassed all at once. "Why do you do it then?"</p><p>Kim leans back on his hands, smirking like an asshole. "Never know when I might need some blackmail material."</p><p>Way suddenly looks worried, rubbing his palms on the knees of his jeans. "Do you…" he says. "You aren't going to blackmail <em> me </em>, are you?"</p><p>Kim stares at him, quirks a lopsided grin. "Depends on how we break up."</p><p>"You make it sound like it's inevitable."</p><p>"Who knows, dude. There are many things you don't know about me."</p><p>"So, tell me..? There's not much that will get me to stop liking you." Way pats Kim on the knee like he’s trying to slap some sense into him. He looks Kim in the eye, drains every ounce of humor out of his expression. “I know you work hard to be the best at everything, but to me you’re already perfect.”</p><p>The warm feeling that sprouts from Kim’s chest is...new. It heats up the rest of his body to a nice pleasant temperature, spreading to even the tips of his fingers. He isn’t sure what to say, doesn’t want it to be a planned response. He wants it to come from his heart, to effortlessly spout his feelings like a rom-com protagonist, but Kim’s not sure what he actually feels these days.</p><p>“It’s okay,” Way says, mouth pulling to the side in a perfect display of it <em> not being okay </em>. “I know you have trouble with these things. I can wait.”</p><p>Kim gets the urge to both shake and kiss Way. He desperately wants to drive the idea that Way is the stupidest, most understanding, and perfect individual Kim’s ever met directly into Way's brain with a drill. The feeling gets so overwhelming that Kim’s limbs move of their own accord, pushing Way to the floor and tumbling down on top of him.</p><p>Way’s laughter hits Kim like a truck, knocking him back into reality. Kim stares down at the bright, smiling face below him, too raw with emotion to do much other than bury his face in Way’s neck. Way’s arms wind around him like a vice, holding Kim down in a way he hasn’t felt in years, a feeling he’s gravely missed in the deepest depths of his being.</p><p>If Kim cries on his shoulder, Way doesn’t comment. Way says goodnight soon after, smoothing Kim’s hair back to press a sweet kiss to his forehead, and leaving a heavy atmosphere that weighs Kim down enough to sleep peacefully for the first time in ages.</p><p>---</p><p>
  <b>Epilogue</b>
</p><p>Kim stumbles into their shitty apartment in a sketchy part of LA, more than exhausted from his university workload. The smell that hits him instantly starts to soothe all his aches and pains. Rich and spicy and something so purely sweet all swirl in front of his nose like a welcoming hand. Kim rounds the corner to the kitchen, grinning at the sight of Way before him.</p><p>Way scoops a pile of beef and veg onto a plate, looking like the sexiest creature in existence in his shorts and cut-up tank top. He turns, greeting Kim with a lop-sided smile. “I made dinner,” he says as if it’s not already made the house smell amazing. “How was school?”</p><p>“Fine, I guess,” Kim says, wandering closer. He eyes the assortment of dishes sitting on the counter. “New recipes?”</p><p>“Yeah, uh, I’m the only Thai kid in the class so the professor asked me for some input.”</p><p>"Ah." Kim sniffs the air like he hasn't been salivating over it since he arrived. "Smells good."</p><p>Way looks at him with an absolutely wretched grin. “That’s the love you’re smelling. It comes free with everything I make for you.”</p><p>Kim pats Way on the cheek, letting it rest there as he looks him deep in the eyes and says, “You’re disgusting.” Way’s eyes crinkle up with mirth. “Let’s eat it before it gets cold, yeah?”</p><p>Way kisses the palm of Kim’s hand, chuckling to himself as he grabs two of the plates and saunters over to the table. Even with the backdrop of a brick wall out their window, Kim realises that he’ll never regret befriending that stupid troublemaker back in highschool.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Come talk to me at my <em>serious</em> writing blog <a href="https://rosiewritesridiculousshit.tumblr.com//">RosieWritesRidiculousShit</a> or my personal shit-posting account <a href="https://rosiewritesridiculousshit.tumblr.com//">RainbowsPoopingUnicorns</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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